Page 29 - OSG Presents Classic Gamer Magazine #5

ometime circa 1982 or ’83, my when arcade games were still cool and But my mother’s concerns were
father had to go to the local didn’t involve emptying machine gun real – and valid. And this was just in
S Safeway store, and as always, I rounds into enemies (or flattening them 1982, back before the days of teenag-
was more than eager to tag along. with a barrage of karate kicks), I later ers walking into their schools with high-
Why? Because that Safeway store learned what an incredibly stupid caliber weapons and explosive de-
always had four or five arcade games - breach of arcade etiquette I had com- vices, before the era of road rage, be-
usually pretty good ones, too. Around mitted. For, on that day in Safeway, fore I became well-acquainted with
this time, Safeway had gotten a big, right in front of the guy who’d put his anyone’s middle finger as shorthand for
beautiful Kangaroo coin-op, and I was quarter up on the cabinet, signifying frustration.
determined to beat that game. Thus, at that the next game was his, I finished Now it’s 2000. Eighteen years
the tender age of ten, when most kids my game, took that quarter, and later. And these things that were un-
are eager to get away from their aston- popped it into the machine to take thinkable in 1982 do happen. And who
ishingly unhip parents for fear of em- another swipe at ruling the jungle. gets the blame? Everything from The
barrassment, I always, You’re proba- Matrix to Duke Nukem to Judas Priest.
always tagged along “I believe that one of bly thinking, Jeez, Most ardent gamers respond to these
with whoever was go- Earl, how could you accusations with a derisive snort of
ing to Safeway. the reasons classic have been so stupid? laughter, and an almost knee-jerk de-
I remember this in- That’s a good ques- nial. But can we discount it so quickly?
cident distinctly, not for games are back is tion. An even better Perhaps not.
what happened, but for question is: what the No one can deny that the classics
what my mother said because many of us hell is a kangaroo, are coming back. Those of us who are
afterward when I told indigenous to the de- in the twilight of our twenties (or the
her about it. I was who played them as sert outback of Aus- dawn of our thirties) are dragging the
kickin’ ass on Kanga- kids now have kids of tralia, doing in a tropi- classic games back into action, some-
roo, all the way down cal jungle full of mon- times kicking and screaming (the
to the final screen, our own…and those keys? games, that is, not us – well, for the
where one must K.O. My mother was most part, anyway). And I have a the-
enough monkeys to who have become more interested in the ory that there’s a reason for this be-
merit a spot on the first question, how- yond the “critical mass of nostalgia”
ASPCA’s blacklist to parents are worried ever. When I told her that J.C. Herz mentions in Joystick Na-
save little Joey. that some total tion.
An older man – ob- about video game stranger had just put I believe that one of the reasons
viously beyond his late violence.” a quarter up there so I classic games are back is because
teens – stood over my could play another many of us who played them as kids
shoulder and watched, game, she sternly, but now have kids of our own…and those
and a couple of times said “Wow.” He worriedly, said, “I don’t think that’s why who have become parents are worried
apparently thought I was doing pretty he put it there.” about video game violence.
well. (Thanks to my family’s propensity Oh. Now she tells me. I guess I’m sure I just scared someone off.
for emptying the fridge of groceries so Mom had learned more from her brief It’s that knee-jerk reaction: It’s not the
quickly, I had gotten plenty of opportu- obsession with Ms. Pac-Man than I’d games’ fault, dude! Let it go. Now,
nities for practice with every return to given her credit for. even though I’m not a parent (I’m hold-
the store.) She then wondered how my myste- ing that particular wolf at bay as long
And then he put a quarter on the rious – and quite unaware – benefactor as possible!), I’m of the school that val-
cabinet, up against the marquee. Cool! had responded. Good question. Come ues taught at home will shape how a
I thought. Man, he thinks I’m doing to think of it, he had given me a bit of a child filters such influences as games,
so well, he’s just gonna chuck an- funny look. The kind of look that pres- music, TV, and movies. I’m also of the
other twenty-five cents at me so he ages the truncated question “…the hell opinion that the amount of time parents
can watch me play another round! are you thinking, kid?” And then he spend with their kids can also have a
I had never seen anyone do that had walked off. Oops. great effect on how children perceive
before, so what was I supposed to Mom was still worried, however. those influences.
think? Admittedly, my mother had con- Had he said anything? Approached But can you blame parents for want-
ditioned me by once unloading proba- me? Threatened me? To my elder ing to have some say in those influ-
bly ten dollars worth of quarters on me gamer’s credit, he hadn’t. He was un- ences? I firmly believe this is why the
so I could show her what happened at doubtedly frustrated, but if he reacted classics are back. We’d rather give our
the end of a game of Rock-Ola’s Fan- as I would have in my late twenties, he kids Q*Bert and Pac-Man than Tomb
tasy, but I’d never had a total stranger probably stewed over it for about two Raider or Doom. Even Kangaroo, in
give me a quarter! Cool! minutes, then started laughing around which your job is to punch out the lights
In the two or three years to come, the time he got to frozen foods. of any monkey who gets close enough
Classic Gamer Magazine December 2000 29