I am Actiontwinkle. I am a soldier in the greatest war humankind has ever fought: World Wide Web War 1, or
WWWW1, or WWWWI if you’re a historian. It’s the web war to end all web wars, and it might succeed, considering the whole internet is folding. I wasn’t drafted; I volunteered, although at the time I thought I was just filling out a questionnaire about my favorite teen pop band (O-Town). Now that I’m a part of this war I can never turn back, mainly because I owe creditors. You see, Actiontwinkle has a weakness, and it’s called ‘classic games.’

I am on the battlefield, which we dog-faces call “eBay.” I crouch motionless in my foxhole between the “Photo and Electronics” and “Everything Else.” I am ready to strike with lightning speed and deadly spend-thriftiness. I will emerge victorious, and poorer.

Time is my enemy, but at the same time it is my best friend (which reminds me a lot of my second grade pal Andy Jiles; he was my ‘best’ friend, but he would always talk smack about me at the drop of a hat). Time ticks away at exactly the same speed as it usually does. In short, time is an invariable cosmic force that doesn’t change according to my wishes. I have trouble understanding this, but I don’t understand a lot of things. – Read the rest of the article here from Classic Gamer Magazine (courtesy of Old School Gamer)!

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