On the surface, Serious Parody’s “5 Star Wrestling” isn’t even a B+ player. It’s uglier than Bastion Booger and its load times sometimes make Haystacks Calhoun look like Juventud Guerrera.
But just like former WWE Champion Daniel Bryan, it’s got something special.
It’s got heart- and Greg Hearty.
The more you play this game, the more you’ll see that its gameplay mechanics and tiny odes to classic games the likes of “WCW/NWO Revenge” and “WWF No Mercy” are a perfect combination of wrestling goodness.
Unlike the 2K Sports WWE games, you can’t simply take a selfish route and beat the blazes out of your opponent, regardless of who they are. Who you choose to perform with and against will dictate your in-ring psychology. You’ll have to think- like a wrestler.
At the same time, you’ll be rewarded for your time and energy. Again, unlike the WWE games, the movesets in “5 Star Wrestling” have been expertly handled. There are no weird counters that wrestlers have never performed in the ring and every wrestler does their “real” moves. Although a “parody,” you’ll see that every character, from Curtis Angle (Kurt Angle) to HarVee Dee (Rob Van Dam) and Greg Harty (Jeff Hardy) feels authentic. As a result, the game’s small roster of just eight performers doesn’t feel nearly as thin.
Add in a parody of blackballed Chris Benoit (Dynamite Pegasus) and more versions of the RKO in any video game, period, and “5 Star Wrestling” is a sexy indy game that has charisma in spades.
Simply put, what Acclaim once tried to do with the “Legends of Wrestling” series seriously needs to be revisited here. Or even better, why can’t TNA or Ring of Honor bring Serious Parody on-board and have them make their next game? It would be a match made in gaming heaven. An underdog developer who has just proven they have wonderful ideas and just need some extra staff and cash and a promotion looking for more exposure? It’s almost common sense.
As much as “5 Star Wrestling” shines from a gameplay perspective, that doesn’t mean the game is without its problems though. Graphically, “5 Star Wrestling” looks similar to a PlayStation 2 title. Many of the characters have similar faces and lack the type of animation polish and detail that you expect from a PlayStation 3 game. The same thing goes for some of the animations. Every once in a while, you’ll see a foot appear as if it’s floating on the canvas and the apron movement is weak at best. While it won’t destroy the fun, the glitches will make non-believers scoff and go back to their pretty AAA grappler.
But like a Ric Flair match, you don’t watch to see a muscled-up adonis. You want to see savvy. You want to see something different.
The fact that every match is a different one, depending on who you’re wrestling against is a joy. You can’t button mash here. You can’t work the same moves over and over. You have to almost pretend you’re in the ring. Working on a behemoth like Iceberg of Ragnabrok’s legs if you’re a technical performer will not only help you hit the maneuvers you need to win, it’ll stop them from performing their signature maneuvers. To say this is done well is an understatement.
It’s something that’s never been done this well before in a wrestling game.
Although every WWE game over the past decade is prettier and has more wrestlers, the gameplay techniques employed here, although not perfect either, are something special. It’s something real wrestling fans have to check out.
With more finisher variations than any other wrestling game to date and more “thinking” required in every match, “5 Star Wrestling, at least from our first few matches, is a fun game, even in spite of its warts.
Simply put, this is a game any member of the YES Movement will love. It’s drenched in smart, polished gameplay and the sheer amounts of moves and the fun you’ll have playing more than make up for any of its problems.
The Good:
Challenge Mode: Much like WWE 2K’s “Showcase Mode,” this mode forces you to perform objectives in order to unlock items. The only difference is this is much, much more difficult. At the same time, the mode really challenges your mettle and can even make you better at the game.
Awesome Music: The parodies of these eight performers are well done enough that they’ll get stuck in your head. Close enough to the real performers’, but cool enough to stand alone on their own, plenty of time went to getting each performer’s music just right.
A Different Match Virtually Every Time: Matching up different performers will create a different match every time out. Those looking for a serious challenge can easily find it when they match up a bigger star against a technically sound one and will have to unleash their evil side in order to thrive against a face.
Move Variation: With multiple versions of wrestler’s finishing maneuvers, “5 Star Wrestling” makes it possible to really plan out your offense, not forcing you to have a generic and straight-ahead offense every time out.
Finisher-to-Finisher Counters: Rock Bottom to RKO? Ankle Lock to Crossface? “5 Star Wrestling” is perhaps one of the most innovative wrestling games in terms of maneuvers, but the intuitive process it is to pull off these awesome counters is even cooler. Seeing these moves pulled off more than makes up for the glitchy camera and animations.
Limb Damage System: It changes the game entirely. Without it, “5 Star Wrestling” would be able to get by, thanks to a decent amount of maneuvers and Finisher-to-Finisher counters, but being able to work on specific body parts, which limits your opponent’s opportunities to hit you with their signature maneuvers, sets the game apart entirely.
The Bad:
Graphical Issues and Glitches: While the gameplay system is as innovative as a Chris Kanyon match, the visuals look like an unwashed Billy Kidman during his Flock days. Most characters have similar faces and the collision detection needs to be polisher further, especially when characters are on the apron.
Control Takes Time to Get Used to: It works great when you “get” it, but with 2K being the only choice for so long, many gamers will press the wrong buttons early on.
Final Thoughts:
Regardless of some graphical glitches and control that takes time to get used to, “5 Star Wrestling” is the type of wrestling game that will bring back fond memories of the AKI wrestling games on the Nintendo 64, as well as some of the Yukes titles on the PlayStation One, the likes of “WWE Smackdown” and “Power Move Pro Wrestling.” With plenty of moves for each characters and a momentum system that will remind you of the Nintendo 64 classic “WCW/NWO: Revenge,” as well as an awesome limb damage system, “5 Star Wrestling” is an awesome throwback game.
Reviewer’s Note: I’ve never given a game this high a rating with so many small issues and in justification, I feel as if the gameplay mechanics in “5 Star Wrestling” hit a nail that 2K Sports, Electronic Arts, Yukes, THQ and several other companies over the past two decades have failed to strike. The emotions you’ll feel when hitting a Finisher-to-Finisher counter, or when a performer is too hurt to perform their Signature maneuvers is something I, personally, have not felt in a wrestling game since my days with the old AKI games on the Nintendo 64. Coming from such a small team in Serious Parody, “5 Star Wrestling” is proof that great ideas can overcome small budgets and don’t need next-gen visuals. While it isn’t a perfect game, you’ll get more “real” wrestling action out of “5 Star Wrestling” than you will out of any AAA grappler you pick up.
